A fun old party for the child
Who loves to be unruly, wild
Noose streamers strewn all
Hats to impale, and roll call
.
So let’s start, musical chairs
Pull mine out, say it’s all fair
How about blind man’s bluff?
Keep me stumbling, ha, laugh
.
Pin the blame on the donkey
And make an ass out of me
Spin me around and around
You’re good at that anyhow
.
But don’t you keep that pout
Come on, the party’s hot led!
Whack me like I’m the piñata
Bash bats on my paper head
.
Spin the bottle next, nice one
Spill the beans, make kids run
Bottle, bottle, who’s the worst?
It always points along my girth
.
Want cheaper entertainment?
You hire me to be your clown
Throwing shit pies in my face
Attempting to make me frown
.
I wipe the last of seltzer water
Oh, are the party games over?
All the humiliation over with?
It’s time for the candy shower!
.
And when the cards are read
Plastic plates then prepared
Ice cream makes teeth ache
Here it comes, the final break
.
Presents unwrapped in one take
It’s your party, your childish sulk
But I’ve got arsenic in your cake
So go and blow the candles out.