Tag Archives: agony

Ex Nihilo

Oh, but don’t you see? We’re made to destroy

Shooting arrows onto the pockmarked ceiling

Until it loses its shaky grip, and begins falling

Finding another home in the chasm of our skin

.

Creating the chaos that even god won’t decimate

The first sin and final revelation, we will recreate

Holding back the maelstrom, a cataclysm presents

With every pain and agony, the loathing we resent

.

Chasing back the darkness, like starved animals we breathe

Savages tearing apart throats to shreds to get what we’ll need

Bleeding, bruised, medicine refused, suffering keeps us awake

Or we will never stay alive under the weight of all our mistakes

.

Running away from reality, breaking in nothing as we stalled

Tortured eyes seek wandering lies, and scratching at the walls

They make signs and burn our names in the wake of destruction

That we caused with our dying hands, genocide of the generation

.

Can I just have one more, one more…can I just have one more taste?

I won’t make it, won’t make it—I won’t make it through another day

Pleading and obliterating, until all that’s left is you and I alone to die

We’re made to destroy this decomposing world of devastation tonight.

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Synthetic Love

I want to hurt you, I don’t deserve you
Unlace your body, I want total control
Like maggots from the host, you drain, I decompose
Swallow your faith, submit and fuck until we overdose…

~*~

And it’s the kind of love

That makes me slit my wrists

Just so I can prove to you

What you might dare to miss

And if the sunlight dares touch

Your skin, I’ll burn it all out

Darling, you’re simply too much

To satisfy my hunger and doubts

Anyone who speaks your name

Will find themselves maimed

And I’ll burn down all the towns

Of the bastards that left you to drown

Let me taste your writhing agony

Let me hear you scream for me

Let me chase for you with a gun

but I won’t ever hurt you, it’s all for fun

And I’ll slowly pluck off my fingers

To count the days we spent together

Whether you love me or you love me not

We’ll both still be stuck here forever

But it’s the kind of love that makes me

Bleed my heart and slit my wrists

Because I know the reality of you and I

Dear, it will never fucking exist.

~*~

We said this was “the last time” over and over again
(Blind eyes) The closer I get is the further I feel
(Hands tied) And I’m losing my grip on remembering what’s real
‘Cause our synthetic love is all that we know
My head is a mess, and it’s going to explode…

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Collide in Contagion

Bury me in the bedroom where I, I can sing you to sleep all night
Put me next to the open window, promise me a second time
‘Cause I don’t want to leave without you buried by my side
I’d rather kill the one responsible for falling stars at night
Cause they fall all around me, the night can be deadly….

~*~

You’re the honorary

Disease of my cardiovascular

Eradication, love

The million spider bites

Injecting toxin in my system

Until my nerves seize

Like the abrupt hitch of my

Asthmatic breath when

Your fangs sank into soft flesh

And painted my skin red

Red as the cerise vows you made

That gave me scarlet fever

.

But where would we end up

If it weren’t for your pellucid palate

And bloodlust for melodrama

Rictus interlocked against rictus

Disgustingly quivering as

Both mouths whispered bullshit

That intensifies the acrid taste

Of our executed demise

I’ll carve profanities in your

Fractured ribcage, and pierce this

Needle past your deflated lungs

Serrated viciously until you gasp for air

.

I buried this disgusting romance

Under a reckless murder scene

And if you think you can dig it back up

I’ll hit your head with the shovel

Your eyes are protanopic machines

My lips feel like corroded metal

So rust away the scar tissues

And mangle in the alkaline fear

Pernicious hysteria and controversies

Realining my taut fasciculus

Sealed surgery with parallax thorns

Festering in my paralytic accident again

.

So tell me if my parasitic mind

Is as right as your moral ambiguity

I’m inhaling your reputation

Like crushed cocaine and car smoke

But the crash test of my dopamine

Is beginning to rapidly decline

And the agony of your bruises are

Already starting to fucking set in again

My encephalon is incapacitated

You took advantage of the ill

But love, if this is what it takes to

Collide me with your wrecked body

Then I don’t ever want to heal.

~*~

And I don’t care if you’re sick
I don’t care if you’re contagious
I would kiss you even if you were dead
Would somebody make me go blind for the rest of my life?
‘Cause I’d do anything to hold your hand!

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tylenol

solemn headaches

keep me awake

sleepless energy

past the dull ache

screaming migraines

keep me insane

insomniac clarity

past agonising pain.

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sad talk

it’s quite nice

to be depressed

when you have

nothing to say

for motivation

is a madness

and its agony is

the price you pay.

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Confected Cycles

A caged throat

Screaming relentless

And fires siege

Tempting syndromes

Agony weeping

In a numbing addiction

Clotting misery

Blood and deathwishes

Sorry little lies

Killing every will to exist

I can’t complain

I know it will always end

Fucked-up like this.

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An Affair with an Angel

You know that, I’m a nightmare and I’m going crazy
You’re going nowhere so
I’m taking you with me (out of line)
This is what you get when you fuck with a classic roundabout
But it just might be me out of line…

~*~

Paying for intense fire that presents itself in metaphor

This is what you deserve for putting it out

Screaming fucking hell into a payphone call to heaven

Until the plastic receiver melts your mouth

Conflagrating under pyres that consent your affliction

That’s what you get for falling in addiction

Sending letters to dear agony signed in your own blood

Hoping for a reply, but it never reaches God.

~*~

I’m relentless
I’m relentless
I’m relentless!

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metal & skin (xi.)

waiting for the right

time to come

isn’t really helping

all it does

is further intensify

the agony

that you’re prolonging.

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re-drown

we have wound back

to where we all started

zero degrees farenheit

the rain slashes torrents

of the heartbeats that slow

and the blood that boils

into the misdemeanour, as

unforgivable as my vice

.

we have drawn back

to where it all started

a hundred degrees celsius

the circles tracing our steps

of the nerves screaming agony

from the blood that thins into

an unescapable ocean wave

and if there was any way out

let me learn how to swim.

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Schreiende Sterne

Tears from agony

And tastes like burning skin

There’s a solemnity

Indulged in your screaming

A cold childish sorry

Of another blood scintillating

A summer catastrophe

Of failed dusty stars colliding.

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