Tag Archives: boredom

idle

fending away the flies

in this miserable heat

seconds spin sluggishly

routine feels discrete

.

finding a final flight

in the middle of a beat

minutes missing endlessly

routines fast deplete.

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30 – alma mater

this day is turning into ten years

and as i mill around from class to class,

all i ever excel at is the art of invisibility

and how to walk out of my own body

carrying a weight around, everywhere i go

and nodding until my head feels like

it’s no longer mine to move at will

but i endure, and keep my gaze down,

and stay out of trouble; out of sight,

out of mind, out of time—and wasting

away for four more dreadful years,

until ten years turn into a day.

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insensitive

today i slammed

my thick dumb head

on the hard concrete wall

until it bled and bled

because i was just bored

because i felt dead

because i’m too impatient

and made of pure lead

but it wasn’t as cool

so i moved on to needles

stab sharp pricks on my hand

as i made up a riddle

and the red lighter, it did

such an amazing job

it was quite a burn—literally

and these blisters i’ll have

for the rest of my life

just like the scars i made

all from yesterday and today

with the edge of my blade

no, i don’t like the abuse

i just like the pent-up violence

and if i had to take it out

better me than anyone else

so fucking call me masochistic

it’s not like i’d feel insulted

or maybe i will—try me

if that works, good job, friend

‘cause i’m just too numb

and the pain is only fun

when you stop caring about everything

and start aching for the gun.

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summer stasis

Well, I guess I could
Sell some nice things
Or write about how good
My life’s been…

~*~

empty pages

being held hostage

by the sweltering wind

of six years spent

without any due journey

or any further recourse

.

i want to change

to arrest new adventures

with the tip of my pen

but, it seems, another year will go

with me complaining about

nothing but being bored.

~*~

Maybe I should drop it
Pick a different subject
Maybe it’s deliberate
If it’s lacking substance…

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Halo Blue

We tore our phones to shreds
We didn’t answer nothing
To all friends and family, lost or dead
I couldn’t get much sleep
You lost your self in mine
It couldn’t get much worse…

~*~

Systematic shutdown, and one by one my optimism closes

You pulled the plug on the starlight that keeps me awake

I may not be in my melting point, but I’m still a hot-lead mess

I think I’d rather stay dead than to keep my tongue fake

.

There’s nothing else I would feel if not for our blue hair bet

But mine is deep ocean dark, yours is a bubblegum ice cream hue

Even if we blended together, we can’t ever be a scarlet sunset

Does that mean we should just stop trying? I say it’s all up to you

.

I’m usually full of shit, but I like you and I don’t like anyone, hey

You’re one of my favourite few, and if I were well-versed, I could say

That my eyes are only four glimpses away from reaching your sun

But I’m not, so I guess all I can say is a cliche point-blank ‘you’re fun’

.

Fine, it’s not all about me and my sadness, but I don’t have to care

I’ve been withholding my cries for help ever since I discovered it was there

I might not be cool enough for your cult, but I wanna join the club

Of the haters asking for another lobotomy and demented idiots equally in love

.

With this systematic shutdown’s taking over, one by one my cynicism closes

And you pulled out the wires and circuits to turn off the stars that burned into my sleep

I don’t think I’m thinking straight from thinking about your thoughts all the time

But I would rather stay down than to keep lying to myself about what I can take and keep.

~*~

I think I’ll die obsessed
Let’s give up fighting back
You don’t need to grip the best
Because we’re lucky people
And you’ll never have to sleep alone…

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confined

iv line around my neck

needles piercing with a pinch

saline as steady as the flowing blood

working past vein and skin

drip. drip. drip.

on the liquid cycle goes

of crimson and clear

of dehydration and decay

of a sickness and sane

as maddening as the silence

that i take for alternative company

in the four confining walls

of this sterile, whitewashed institution.

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sophomore soporific

bed weather

is mocking me

i’m lost in muffled

humming of a

drowning reverie

i could be asleep

this very moment

and dreaming in glass

but instead i’m

still stuck here dying

and rotting in class.

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Listless Leisures

Rustic old town

Hazelnut coffee

Silk cream gown

Riffle decadently

Pen in one hand

Of tremulous red

Way on the stand

Singing about end

Orange and ginger

On bavarian cream

Summer night stirs

In hazy daydreams.

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Infinity Pool

infinity

in

your

eyes.

as

you

swim

through

the

milky

haze

of

drowned

reality

alone.

infinity

on

high—

but

that’s

all

you

ever

really

needed

in

order

to

hold

on.

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