Tag Archives: disgusted

numb and number

why do i constantly

feel the need to fuck up?

even though the same

mistakes me always cost me

a blood excavation

is it because i just want

to find excuses to just keep

on relapsing? am i really

that messed in the head,

that i would need pain justified

to convince myself that i’ll

fucking need more of it?

for once, i wish i wasn’t capable

of writing until i’m as empty

as my pen and as indecipherable

as the paper i tore to shreds

i’m so sick and disgusted

of how i badly run my system

and really, the only option

is for the gears to stop working

or better still, fix what i can

with a quicker pharmacy visit

and offset an overdosed withdrawal

i just want to muffle it all

can’t i be allowed even that, at least?

can i just no longer feel?

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Castigations

Talk candy in my ear, come on, come on
I want your toxic, talk sick baby
I know those gospel lips can change me
Look to the right of my okay?
We got exhibit “A″, she, she ain’t okay today…

~*~

Coronary seductions are tart, let’s play a fun fucking game

As you mess up the combinations, I’ll hook up on my brain

Stalactites of sinner spit and cold sick stains on the carpet

Tortured strains of dinner hits, but don’t blame the peeved pet

Incendiary souls sparking and dancing on a shower of alcohol

Gaslight and butane wars, that’s all it’ll mandate for you to fall

Avuncular terrorisation, but you’re getting a little too touchy

That’s enough from the queen of hearts and the king of babies

I understand this is against a chilling breeze, a carnival ride wrought for two

Only I get motion sickness too easily to please, and I’m already sick of you

Nasty, I know, just enough to make candid heavens whip their backs and cry

Still, if this story didn’t have a laughable tragic ending, then I wouldn’t even try.

~*~

The last contendent
Bad for us, bad for you
This capillary root could root up
All the little puzzle pieces
Of what you’ve been through…

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