Tag Archives: expect

A Fool That Stands For Nothing

What good is a life
When you live it ashamed?
I dream just to be halfway
But all I am is a product of
Wasted efforts and best intentions…

~*~

I should have let the rope hurt me

Before I let it fully embrace my breathing

I covered the hope with a black curtain

So I wouldn’t have to see disappointment again

What did I expect? That it would disappear?

That I have everything to gain and nothing to fear?

I fought against reason and wasted my life scared

Asking for every idle chance from a god that wasn’t there

Now they all smile sympathetically and say it’s okay

You weren’t the ones that failed, so how would you know?

Every inch of comfort is uncomfortable and sickening

And every movement from the side is insanely slow

I should have seen it coming, and damn it, I really thought I had

But my head is stubborn and twenty doses of stupid, and I wanted it bad

I act like I’m so clever and apathetic, when all I am is pathetic

I never wanted to let you down, but I did…I fucking did.

~*~

We do this while you start wondering
If disaster is what you’re built for
Will I slowly learn to accept
That I won’t have more than a life on the sidelines
Or will I always be dreaming
Of liking life from the darkness alone?

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thanks for nothing

i know that

i shouldn’t expect

you to be any grateful

but i would expect

at least to feel less

useless and more useful.

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Liplock Torture; Suffering Greys

And I can’t tell if this is all a dream or if I’m really here
But as long as I can feel you, I don’t really care, I don’t really care
Can we pretend like it’s just you and me?
I wanna act like I can feel something
And you don’t have to give it back to me…

~*~

do you feel me

breathing in your sins

and suffocating in third degree as

you mercilessly watch me die?

.

i wouldn’t care but

a single rejection would be nice

.

any reaction, even if

you laugh at my suffering

it doesn’t have to be an outcry of protest

because i know it never works like

that, you’re not a dreamer

.

i’m losing the feeling

in my fingers, but still, you won’t

hold them and pull me back

.

i’m dangling like

the burning cigarette between your lips

and sooner or later i will be

falling like the ashes

.

i could swallow

a million razors right now, and

still, you’d act as if it was simply sweet

.

i didn’t know what to expect

i can’t fathom why i even expected anything

you’ll always get the best of my worst

blue oceans pulling me into pacific

shooting my veins under a loaded gun

leaving my eyes with a vacancy

.

i could hope for a million years until it kills me

and even then, you wouldn’t cry.

~*~

‘Cause I can’t promise much of anything
I see in shades of grey, I’m going blind again
But when it comes to you, my world is red
I see in shades of grey, losing my mind again
‘Cause when it comes to you my world is deep red…

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Severing Heartstrings

I’m a ghost in your eyes
A shadow you can’t seem to recognise
I have a thought of you for every, star in the sky
But I’m scared, I’ll never cross your mind…

~*~

Lusted contrivances hold a harangued heart

The chaos of the slow moment is lost in the depart

Further regressing, counting ocean shore waves

Falling into the demesnes of a shadow I can’t save

Where the houses are burned to build a bonfire

And the dissemination is nothing but a pipe desire

What can be wrong with the things one can’t expect?

And what does this heedless vitriol bring to that next?

The sharpest tools have rusted away into desperation

Until one can no longer cut away those strings of infection

Finding museum peace over the turnstiles of amusement

This heart may be heavy but the weight can circumvent.

~*~

Will our stars ever align?
Will two hearts, beat in time?
These words you should always remember
To you, my heart I surrender…

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Rücksicht

you never act like a

decent human being

i did not know what

i should even expect

but i thought wrongly

that someone as sensible

as you will have the grace

to show a little respect.

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