Tag Archives: familiar

L’exquise L’angoisse

Palpitating arteries eviscerate, a familiar taste that tastes like nothing

Frustrated art under his eyelids fading, clever words I’m never caught saying

Lost impressions leave deceptions, a tempestuous flood caught in the fray

Wish my headspace wasn’t suffocating the sun day after another day

.

Imagination stuttering, slowly dying, what are you trying to hide?

If hell’s your new phenomenon, I’m afraid it’s far too late to be described

Every broken bone that the restless audience throws back to your act

Refusing to feel right again, this time I know that I don’t know where to start

.

Don’t look at me. Don’t look at my deathwish. Nor my blinded existence.

I do not wish to breathe the same way you do. Do not bleed out of my presence.

My words are glass blades lodged under my bruised throat, so do not dare me to cough

The eclipse feels impossibly heavier without your weight to hold me down

And so I quietly submerge with only the sound of my empty thoughts.

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Musical Musings

As you cry in silver rings and pose
In a second you’ll be high and in the clouds alone
I never thought I’d see the day
But I see stars around your face
Just like we’re in the movies and you’re scared…

~*~

Music comfortably pouring in my ears

Of dulcet lullabies and scratchy guitar riffs

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Keeping me warm, tones ever so familiar

Like an oversized threadbare pastel sweater

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Like stirred english breakfast tea with no sugar

Like a burst of drizzling rain in the middle of summer

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Like pleasant catnaps, huddled under soft covers

Like ocean waves cresting on coastal barriers

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Like million-dollar paintings over the moon’s craters

Like a necklace of stars, quaintly twinkling as it scatters

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Like fever dreams, syrupy and floral, quinine waters

Like a springtime frolic spent floating down winding rivers

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Like nightmares and cold terrors and peter pan nevers

Like forgotten phantoms left faded for a lost lover

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Like all the nostalgic memories still keeping me together

Like one existence that’s forever changed for the better

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Tranquil music that feels comforting, familiar, and safe

And when everything’s simply too much, it’s my only escape.

~*~

Step back, I can’t believe
Do the math, the sky will fall anyways
Trust me, this is a blessing and a curse
This much I can’t deny…

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Sleepyheads

Found no solution but to let the pieces fall where they fall
Even with nothing left, I’ve got more than you know
I wanna let you in and we’ll begin
I oversimplify this all the time
Somehow I think that I’m alone
I wake up every day and change my mind…

~*~

Good morning, darling sunshine, how are you today?

I’m a thousand miles where I live, and a million where you are

But it’s a little closer to you, and a little less familiar

I’m up eight floors of daybreak and shaded in viridian colours

Although it’s a quiet haze for me, I’ve never felt better

.

Good morning, yellow lovely, hope you’re having a great day

My blankets may be cold, but my dreams feel rather safe

Of insane trainwrecks and mad doctors and accidental murders

Okay—perhaps it was a little strange, but I must confess

I woke up in metaphysical iridescence, and I’ve never felt the best

.

Good morning (or perhaps evening), how do you do?

I’ve gone to places and labyrinthine mazes and incoherent disputes

But the best is where I was, where I don’t think too much

Where I’m content with overly-caffeinated nights and later-day chats

And I still constantly think of home—not the place I’ve been

But inside the illusion of infinity thereafter, where I’m contented again.

~*~

Why did I let it go? Why did I leave myself?
No explanation as to why I’m here and not somewhere else
It’s reaping what I sow, I think I need some help
I wanna let you in, and we’ll begin..

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eau de cologne

swathes of perfume—

a familiar scent in the storm

bewildered by wonders

and shadows on the dictaphone

renegade tears; again

they surround charlatan hearts

in sounds of scissor envy

the wineglass is fermented sour…

time vanishes into aether.

the threadbare tale of old lovers

bloom on daybreak scorch

akin to an elaborate kaleidoscope

incinerating infinite galaxies.

your anarchy is no longer ghastly

and the oasis of the cityscape

blinks out in a mosaic, one by one

as i quell my febrile miasma

and twist sullen on my empty bed

your form outline is long gone—

but your lingering fragrance remains.

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the familiar taste of poison

Drink the wine, my darling, you said
Take your time and consume all of it
But the roses were only to drain my inspiration
The promises were spoiled before they left your lips and…

~*~

treacherous poison

that’s all you have in your blood

and you infected me

you infected me

yet you blamed me solely for the taint

saying it was my filthy tongue

and its harsh truth words

saying that it was all my fault

it was all my fault

i attempted to get rid of the dirty blood

purging and expelling until i nearly bled out

and still, i can’t get rid of it all

i can’t get rid of it all

you called my ritual a crime

an unforgivable transgression that should

be shunned and immediately cured

as if the sickness wasn’t in the blood

the sickness wasn’t in the blood

so pray tell, was it my sin

to vain uselessly to dissociate from you

and from your corrupted veins

coursing through every offspring you have

toxic brainwashing every single one

and further spreading it to the crashing tree

transmitting and scattering rapidly until it promptly rots

until it promptly rots

now you threaten to disown me

but it’s the kindest thing you could ever do to me

because i’m tired of having to live through

all your sanctimonious ideals

and profane vitriol brewing in your decayed heart

but even then, it wouldn’t completely get rid

of the poison you passed on to me

you passed on to me

and i will concoct more spite in my mind

and spit out evil blood

in the pure eyes of the innocent

damaging others as you have damaged me

you have damaged me

i wish i was someone else whose

hatred isn’t malignant and contagious

but hell, what else can i do? it runs in the family

it runs in the family.

~*~

I could fight this ’til the end
But maybe I don’t want to win
I breathe you in again just to feel you
Underneath my skin, holding on to
The sweet escape is always laced
With a familiar taste of poison…

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