Tag Archives: lies

Saving my Sleep for the Sirens

The frame, the friction
It’s the reason that we all become aware
And we change for no reason
Some say it’s better to fall asleep and disappear
It’s time we finally look at what we’ve done
And wake up…

~*~

I cannot sleep, this haunt persisted to stay

I need a hand here to suffocate my throat

Lie, otherwise I won’t have another today

Amidst arctic isles and glaciers I will float

.

Don’t they know that’s all I dream about?

Perhaps I am just too ambitious to forget

Say I’m right, indulged in septic fantasies

Teetering at the edge of a cliff over death

.

But my jealous mind is pushing me farther

I couldn’t dissolve my nightmares, after all

Standing with my back against the red sun

And screaming, I have never felt more tall

.

I am another thought that lacerates skins

If you bleed out because of me, so let it be

Seeking an escape, the exit sign’s blinding

And I’m chasing circles away from misery

.

I am slipping out, my foothold is unstable

Through rain and ashes, I bathe in debris

Threads unravelling of stitches miserable

I cannot fall from touch, never sedentary

.

I’ve wished for a dollar that I won’t be rich

They call me insane, but that’s the way it is

The point I try to make is never transparent

But the light from my lies makes it apparent.

~*~

So here we are, we’re waiting for a fall
And on the radio they’re calling on satellites
Like they’re going to save us all…

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No One Does It Better

If these whispered words don’t make sense

Because all the things you say are in past tense

I’ve never seen a frown quite like yours, dear

We’re moving too quick, I can barely see past the tears

.

Things won’t change with the blink of a blue eye

There’s a crash in the system, and a sun that won’t die

Leave it all behind when your feet is barely touching the ground

Searching for a secret place where you could never be found

.

Let’s stay out late and laugh about the childish lies that could never be

If I chain myself to your bleeding wrists, would I be set free?

But somehow there’s a moral somewhere in this addicting vice

I’ll simply smile behind your back and I’ll play nice, I can play nice

.

This was nothing but trouble, but it was all worth it to me

We’re going down, I told you about how it’s gonna go wrong badly

The alarm is sounding, red lights flashing, and we’re dancing under fire

Can you still hear me as you drown under the depths of desire?

.

The bitter taste was my saving grace, my only reason to live

I’m too tired to find my problems now, I’m too tired to know what I can give

I don’t know what I was thinking when I pulled the curtains shut

The rope around my neck is keeping me hanging on, please understand that

.

I would be out of line to say how damn beautiful you look tonight

But even if I’m not allowed to speak, that doesn’t mean that I’m not right

I was hoping to take a hold of the lost future we saved for the last

It wasn’t the best we had, but it’s better compared to the past

.

The headache is beginning to grow, I think it’s highly contagious

The room is spinning and my vision’s blurring, and I’m going delirious

Your honesty is something to be jealous about, and your vanity’s not your sin

Your virtues burn faster than your cigarettes, inhale the smoke within

.

I woke up with all your bags packed and gone, and the cab you hailed was denying

This is just another difficult test, and it’s one that I seem to be failing

The grudges I held onto left faster than your memories, I’m not losing sleep over you, it’s true

And if there’s any reason to move past, dear, no one does it better than you.

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Unnecessary Assurances

My soundness of mind

Cannot be measured by

Lies forming on words or

By mere lines from a ruler

So thanks for the concern

And worried calls, but I’m

Dealing with this shit alone

And I’ve never been better.

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Come on Holly, Put the Gun Down for Me

Love me as you lay
Dizzy and falling, y
our legs dangling
Accidents happen, they happen to me
Try to forget the beginning and end…
Forget the world!
Without removing t
he glass from your lips!

~*~

Make me another promise

About the seven sins I spilled

All over your faded grave

And the starry innocence I killed

I know I haven’t been the best

But I did it when you were at your worst

Holly, you’re making me choke

I’m steering off my turnpike course

Don’t let me go away now

When I’m about to ask you how

Everything under the roses

Makes me think in bloodred guesses

This rage is highly contagious

It’s severing my every vein quite vicious

The candle lights mask your tears

Only your sunny friends never hear

Holly, you’re killing me here

Your ambitions are craving my envy

Dysthymia’s slipping on your lips

Like cold Novocain and an apology

But don’t call me then hang yourself

Trying to reach for the dollar on the moon

Playing hooky’s bad for your health

We’ll grow up, but not too soon

These fingertips left marks on my throat

With every white lie that you spoke

Holly, I still love the way you murder me

I’ll offer you my doubts and maybe’s

But life can be a cruel farce to envision

I’ll keep the gun from my mission

Your necklace of bullets complimentary

To the blood falling on my gurney

You won the fight Holly, and no pet names

Will taint your rallying soul anymore

And I spent all of my what-ifs and initial fame

Simply trying to attempt to keep score

I have got nothing else left to give but my never

‘Cause I thought these two hearts called a truce

Now tell me Holly, when you say that it’s all over

I understand, but what have you got to lose?

~*~

Doll up and sleepwalk
Until we have some teeth marks
Narcotic sweet talk
Until we have some teeth marks…
(This whole place is gonna burn!)

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Hymn for the Faithless

Our Father, who art in Heaven

Hallowed be thy fame, kingdom

Of temptation we lust for again

Deliver us for your evils, amen

A wickedness in these blue eyes

The sword I carry impaling skin

What must mortal consequences

I shall atone for my begotten sin

Blood on my tears, fallen I wept

These are the songs I am to kept

Pains I pray, damned for my lies

God, am I truly lost in thine eyes?

Blasphemy and sacrilegious vow

Of pious sinners and dead saints

Mercy begat our veneration now

No longer should serpents repent

Dust are we all for a proclamation

Hate leads to lust, our destination

One last surrender, final farewell

In before darkness embraces Hell

My banished halo is extinguished

Drowned by the ashes of the fires

And when my wings are scattered

Beckon not the fine requiem choir.

Hail Mary full of desecrated virginity

For wars I indoctrinated, forgive me

Hearts for hearts, a stigma for stigma

Holy be thy bastard son, a miracle enigma…

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In the Defence of the Liar with No Fault

I know you hate me , I can see through your eyes
I feel the same way, you had the guts to take me by surprise
Maybe I should call it quits, I know you like to see me like this
I rot inside to fight the fight, you know I can’t win…

~*~

INJECT THE VENOM

I will lie, lie, lie

Smile through my lying little chemical teeth

So bite, bite, bite

And if you die, don’t blame me for being toxic.

~*~

LIKE THE TEETH OF A SHARK

You’re all sad talk and no snarl

I’d get caught between your pointing fingernails

Well fuck me for declaring war

Against someone who’s up for an imminent fail.

~*~

DESPERATE MINDS MEAN DESPERATE MEASURES

We’re playing a game of textbook blame

Spin the bottle, flip a coin, bait my name

All chances and hunches and cold guesses

‘Til you’re reduced to wallow in sorry messes.

~*~

IF THE DOLLAR IS RIGHT

Don’t wake me up, I’ll stay sober without your hate

It’s disgusting and abrasive, the way you’re unmade

By trembling little boys and big guns under your chin

But I’ll shut up, pull the trigger, and choke on my gin.

~*~

YOU’RE A LOADED GUN

I’m just a fucking jerk, so loathe me again

I’m just an easy target, so blast off my brain

I’m just a tactless bitch, so keep on crying

I’m just another fuck, so hate me for hating.

~*~

Maybe I should cut my wrists
You know I’ve never been fucked like this
You’ve ripped my heart apart
You know who you are
You’re a godamn liar, you’re a goddamn liar
I don’t want to care, like I want to care…

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panic attack

i’m lost

my head hurts thorough

i’m lost

i’m dizzying into a vertigo

i’m lost

my heart’s palpitating

i’m lost

my anxiety’s neverending

i’m lost

my vision is blurred, unfocused

i’m lost

my mind’s plagued with locusts

i’m lost

i say i’m okay, but no one’s asking

i’m lost

i assure myself, i stopped caring

i’m lost

get me out of this useless crowd

i’m lost

thoughts i can’t complain aloud

i’m lost

no one notices, they’re engrossed mindlessly

i’m lost

if i collapse now, they’ll step over my body

i’m lost

i can’t breathe. i can’t breathe. i can’t breathe.

i’m lost

fucking help me, anyone, anything…please…

are you lost?

what, me? no no, i’m fine. i’m fine. let’s go.

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The Ba[sta]rd

What do I have to do

To prove to you

That these songs don’t

Bleed for your ego?

I understand you’re not

Paper thin, I think

But I never knew you can

Be this absurdly thick

I know you reckon

I’m all rose and posies

But I smash my mirror daily

And rip off the rosaries

For the only way I’ll

Ever know how to feel

Is with the metal blades

As a numbing thrill

But don’t get me wrong

Love’s as good as it gets

It’s like a dying dog

Flea infested and wet

Oh, how I fucking wish

There’s just so much more

But that’s the finale

Of my transparent score

So catch the obvious

With your obscured eyes

So you’d refrain from

Obsessing with asinine lies

I have just gone through

A truckload of shit

And you don’t even fucking

Know the half of it

I can’t be loquacious so

I write it all in ink and blood

There’s no one else I

Could dare trust to nod

And I don’t need your burden

To add to my heavy load

So just bait another sucker

Crashing on the road

But don’t sympathise now

With my hypodermic needles

I’m just a first class prick

But when I’m feeling deep

Am I ever glad to have

A buddy that’s a total git.

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taciturn molecules

colliding glances

which screamed

of whispery lies

it was the closest

we’ve ever got to

saying goodbye.

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4 a.m. depression and jealous pasts dripping off the ceiling

thrumming

like fucking echoes

of a firefly miracle

in my coronary doldrum

beating, b-r-o-k-e-n

tongue hanging off

like the way the stars

hold on for gravity but

fall against pierced glass

of darkness anyways

i’m relapsing, r e  c   e    d     i      n        g

the past is killing me again

i say i’m alright

but shit, what if i lied

to myself as well?

the cringes that burrowed

their way into my gelid skin

and gutted my stomach

until i end up heaving in

blood and bile and scissor blades

and choking on perfume

as sweet as promises undone…

fuck you. fuck YOU

please leave me alone, walk

away from my nightmares and

leave my sanity on the doormat

i don’t want to taste your pain

and leave drunk calls on

your answering machine again.

please stop me from you

everything is hurting like hell

on a four a.m. depression

and i’m just trying to fucking

take back sunday and my sleep

from you, so spare me the

profanities and give it back

please, won’t you?

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