Tag Archives: MAD

Mad Mary Lennox

I still remember the world
From the eyes of a child
Slowly those feelings
Were clouded by what I know now—
I still remember the sun
Always warm on my back
Somehow it seems colder now…

~*~

You were the tears I could never release.

I am imprisoned for centuries in an impenetrable ribcage, feeling the lemongrass harshly piercing my calloused feet but never allowing my deprived senses to take in their ethereal fragrance, holding blossoms by their fragile throats and quietly wishing for their efflorescent scarlet to return and splash colour on my filthy grey dress again, and forevermore shackled and watching the suspended horizon; but a mere intangible memory playing tricks on my open lips.

It was beautifully haunting. My demented secret garden.

You alone held the key to the concealed gates. That particular key was crudely carved from roses and bones, finely forged of romance and blood, chiseled from my consumed heart and threaded with my vulnerable veins, but akin to the overflowing ocean of the tears trapped within my tired, pondering eyes, you released me not.

But will I despair? Never. I shall merely smile at your vicious cruelty and wait for patience with all the grace and forgiveness the pallid moon has adorned me with. I’ll peacefully sleep on my bed of fallen feathers and butterfly ashes, and I shall awake again the next day, my marred body still glimmering in a breathtaking fairy tale iridescence, to tend to my own share of bruised paradise and to sing my laments to the ardent stars in the missing sky once more.

Because this exquisite garden shares my every pain, my solitary desire, my one secret, and not simply the very secrecy itself. This sanctuary is mine to hold in eternal memoriam, and in an infinite someday, these silver chains will rust off and unfetter, as the reckless revolution of this damned planet will halt and reverse, away from the sun. And when that happens, you will find yourself starving for sweet freedom and clawing at the iron bars haplessly, forever banished in my grotesque heaven, where all the scathing thorns bear your broken name and all the flowers wilt at the very despicable thought of your nonexistent soul.

And you shall weep. And I, finally, along with you.

~*~

Where has my heart gone?
Trapped in the eyes of a stranger
Oh, I, I want to go back to
Believing in everything
I still remember.

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Filed under Prose

Overcast

Outside for the first time in a long time
You said you can’t remember what it’s like
To feel more than cold on the inside
But the sunrise will come again and you’ll be just fine…

~*~

It’s been too long

Since I last felt sad

When the pink clouds

Didn’t make me mad

.

It’s been too long

Since I last had a motion

To mess things up

Fall away from the season

.

It’s been too long

Since I last felt the hurt

Sinking deep in my chest

Breaking apart my worth

.

It’s been too long

Since I’m out of style

When the cold was fine

I hung around for a while

.

It’s been too long

Since I shed a real tear

Let myself slide away

Succumbed to my fears

.

It’s been too long

Since I last waited again

For failure to go away

Let the dark into my skin

.

It’s been too long

Since I last saw a daylily bloom

Summer’s just a breath, and I want to stay

But it’s been too long since I last found a reason.

~*~

You are the rustling of leaves
And you are that honeysuckle breeze
You are the sunlight
Shine onto me, shine onto me…

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Filed under Poetry

A Mad Boy’s Love Letter

(Written as a reciprocal to Sylvia Plath’s Mad Girl’s Love Song. A poor reciprocation notwithstanding, but nevertheless, carry on.)

~*~

Charm that allures in whim

A grandiose wicked scheme

Deluding myself in dalliance

Chemical love, not romance

T’was my best man, insanity

Blackness simpers arbitrary

I dream a castigated fantasy

Pray judge such not harshly

.

If both lips existed out there

Then heaven, it must be rare

If you mayn’t one so tangible

Then hell, it may be beautiful

The stars, t’were yours alone

Though you needn’t bemoan

We shall carry our revelry on

To hanging gardens Babylon

.

I promised I will return warm

And collapse in abstract arms

Yet tragedy, it reared its face

My name was already erased

I mightn’t be the thunderbird

Roaring to my springtime girl

Rather a demigod, a faded blue

Making the world drop for you

.

For nay was I a corporeal creation

I lacked in belief to conjure it long

Without you love, I would be dead

(Or was it simply all inside my head?)

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Wonderblunder

Write me a quaint song of broken dreams

And colourless atoms floating at the seams

Steal me an onyx magpie’s magical coin

And a one-way ticket to Oz you can purloin

.

Throw me a pebble in an old wishing well

Against a green witch’s dark jinxed spells

Buy me a dress of the best rainbow’s cloth

Flashing a mirage like a shimmering moth

.

Take me down to the craziest Wonderland

White Rabbit and Alice falling hand in hand

Where you and I can just simply be all alone

In the madness that we could never have owned.

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Filed under Poetry

Cri de Coeur

~*~

EN DÉCÈS

I am not angry at you, in all honesty

I’m very calm and peaceful, you see

As I slowly slide this knife deeper into your spine

I’m not mad; just smiling at your life’s decline.

~*~

EN PASSANT

Thinking thoughts of an elegant crime

Pondering ways to cover up my tracks

Driven mad by my own soul overtime

But I have returned, and I’m back in black.

~*~

EN ROUTE

You shatter the lightbulb into sharp little pieces

And plunge me into total darkness ahead

You hand me a flashlight to help with my travels

But the batteries are dead.

~*~

EN PRISE

I was the foolish moth drawn into your light

Burnt my own wings, now impossible for flight

But as I crawled on, still enthralled by your sight

You snuffed yourself out and left me cold and blind in the night.

~*~

EN FEU

You burned down my soul, you burned down my heart

And in return, I burned down your own house apart

Fight fire with fire, pyromaniacs trapped in a flaming mess

And in the end, all that remains are bitter grey ashes.

~*~

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The Last Straw

Don’t try to deny it
You cannot hide it
I’ll be ignited
When I get to watch you burn

~*~

Temper licked at my mind like an uncontrollable blazing fire

My eyes flashed vivid crimson as I envisioned a funeral for a liar

Nerves soared with prickling feelings, as my heartbeat raced impossibly fast

Rigid muscles itching to take a couple swings and break something at last

Roaring and raging from my throat, explosions and eruptions arose

My primal instincts gave way to anger as my senses came to a close

You pleaded for me to stop this madness, but how utterly hypocritical of you

Because you were the one who snapped in half my very last fragile straw.

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Filed under Poetry

Mutually Assured Destruction (MAD)

You think that I’m a subdued human being;

Just another petty blade of grass

Another normal organism boredly living

So I’m usually ignored and passed

.

But no one knows the terribly ugly truth

The clincher in the clean, orderly path

I am cleverly disguised, like the big bad wolf

No more hiding: I am a psychopath

.

My body’s a highly dangerous minefield

In a wide valley of stepping feet

One little snap, just a small pressure to yield

And off goes my emotions, and my soul shatters, depletes

.

And sometimes, when time comes to time

When dull people like you get tired of living in decline

So what do you do? Take it out on unknowing people like me

Sorry to say, but you just chose the wrong target, honey

.

Talk me trash, test my patience, snap my bones

They’re all just words to me, useless sticks and stones

Because as you laugh like an idiot and titter and scoff

The short countdown in my mind slowly ticks off

.

Throw me around, dirty my good name

Ten, nine, eight, seven

Pick on the innocent, and all in good fun

Six, five, four, three, two…and one.

.

Then I’ll rampage the town, a violent monster

You realize your cataclysmic mistakes

My sense and humanity are there no longer

I’m just a vessel filled with poison and hate

.

You can chase me around with your pitchforks and guns

You can try to hide somewhere, try to get away and run

Or you just simply watch as I madly drench you in blood

As the world cruelly realizes no one’ll save them, there is no god

.

Am I sealing my fate by embracing the black heart of Death?

Will causing utter discord to the innocents bring me regret?

Am I going to burn? I already know all that, see

And you are burning down with me

.

So go ahead then, make a try

If you really dare, just step on me

And we’ll both blow up to the skies

In mutual destruction and entropy.

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Filed under Poetry