Tag Archives: pull

boy with the bullets (smith & wesson)

It’s not fair when you say that I didn’t try
I just don’t want to hear it anymore
I swear I never meant to let it die
I just don’t care about you anymore…

~*~

you’ve been nothing but good to me

and yet i treat you with feral viciousness

spitting sharp razors down your back

and taking a .45 to your bruised throat

like you deserved any of it at all,

but you don’t. if anything, i am the one

who needs to be put down, for all the

crimes i’ve committed against you,

for every inflicted pain and malicious insult,

for every tactless word that travels from

my mouth and straight to your lungs, making

you lose your breath’s momentum again;

for everything i did to you and everything i didn’t…

you deserve to pull the fucking t r i g g e r

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Losing Oxygen

Every famous blunt excuse

That left scuffs on the soles of your shoes

A three-dimensional dementia

Escaping with a bloodied insignia

The air feels solid; just another futile reach

Of what is unhinged and rusted away

Nuanced flares, serendipitous glimpses

Desperation worth what you needed to say

Push and pull at the faulty gravity

As the swelling throats, unable to scream,

Still sing until dehydration and reverie

Now transcending into an angel’s bad dream.

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anatomical dissection: neck

the rope

that pulled

me back

was the rope

that made

me choke

i’d love to steal

the show, but

i can’t sing

with these

puppet strings

around my throat.

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A Momentary Lapse of Judgment

I’m just interference, noise and whispers
A shadow on the light, I’m dust on the record
Stop a static, a click, a compromise
A discord, a spark, a silhouette
A shady ghost, an echo of what’s left…

~*~

Dissonance playing rhythms in my mind

My mouth is barely touching the ground

Both my eyes cannot find their way down

Back again, I am drifting without a sound

In momentary distractions, unmemorable

Surface words leaving the barest of ripples

On the distilled clear of the glacial lakeside

With every lambent flourishing and withers

Silver lines tying and intertwining intricate

Then colourblind separation falls apart like

A shower of collapsing glasshouse, piercing

Opalescent, as shatters of astern fragile skies

Alluvial perspectivism resting itself on hearts

That have never once touched pure rainwater,

The magnitude concealing itself within caprice

And presenting in caustic dyes of oasis failures

Cacophonies dancing tarantellas in my thoughts

And my lilting lips are barely tasting the sunlight

Both of my hands can’t pull their own weight up

Back again, I’m crashing violently without a sight.

~*~

Now I’m interruption
Infinite and momentary
A modest distraction
Incomplete and temporary…

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shady

i don’t want to

pull down the

venetian blinds

from your smiles

so i’ll hide from

the flimsy curtain

and let your glass

hearts shine a while.

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going, going, gone

Why does it feel like home when I’m lonely?
I always found on the solid ground
I was tripping away from space and time
I don’t really mind that I’m slipping…

~*~

would they notice

if my eyes faded away

and i lost my way

to the beckoning light?

the constructed highways

and hanging bridges

i still have to traverse are

too treacherous for my feet

and i can’t drag it out

watch me fight back

my shoulders straining to

remove the weight of the world

from its teetering blades

and yet i fell off the balance

waiting for the end of hell

in the beginning of the creation

closing my open heart

in this faceless underwater

i’ll feel anxiety again if i resurface

so i’ll embrace the cold and let

myself sink peacefully

all the way to the bottom

soothing the burns in my tongue

and the wait that manifests

saying i’ll jump off if i’m far too lost

and no one could come with me

to the deepest end of nowhere

where no one could reach my hand

and pull me back again

into the chaos they call home

who knows if i could still return

maybe i’ll just disappear for a while

after all, no one would notice.

~*~

We could disappear for a while
We could disappear if we’re going far away
It’s not running away, we were never meant to stay
In the first place, we could disappear for a while…

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Glass Shards Taste Sweeter Than Revenge

Cut off my wings and come lock me up
Just pull the plug yeah, I’ve had enough
Tear me to pieces, sell me for parts
You’re all vampires so here
You can have my heart…

~*~

you’re not worth

swallowing eggshells for

i wish i knew before i

digested all your bullshit

not everyone can spill

sunshine when they speak

and i’d rather die by my

own hand than your radiation

so take a fucking razor

and cut your palms open

just bleed the hell out

and drown all the demons

and pull yourself so far under

isn’t that what you always want?

don’t let the roses stop you

burn me out as you did

to those innocent paper towns

because i’m waterlogged anyway

you’ve no use for my pages

and yet you persist to write the

profanities and revilement

just to wipe condescension in

like your own twisted diary

i hope you’re happy now

from slashing my ankles simply

‘cause you got tired of this

if you can’t chase, no one can

honestly i’m glad you cut me off

though i may be crippled, at

least my conscience isn’t paralysed

my shame isn’t metastasised

i guess so long, goodnight, and

good goddamned riddance

hope you have fun stepping on

the glass shards i spit out for you.

~*~

So come rain on my parade, ’cause I wanna feel it
Come shove me over the edge ’cause my head is in overdrive
I’m sorry, but it’s too late and it’s not worth saving
So come rain on my parade, I think we’re doomed
I think we’re doomed, and now there is no way back…

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Pull The Plug

Am I better off dead, is it all in my head?
There’s a snake in my mind, spitting venom and lies
It runs through my veins, paralyzed by the pain
I’m at the end of my rope, as it’s placed around my throat…

~*~

Maybe this time I’ll wear these scars over my shirt

And tell everyone what it means to be hurt

Drag my broken legs around to chase their lost sun

And bite down on my own tactless tongue

Maybe this time I will stop swearing in wasted sins

The serpent in my neck, behead the prince

Drown past crosses, and tiptoe around rosary beads

A faith to tie over my wrists is what I need

Maybe this time I shall cease searching for my aorta

And don’t believe in entropy, even for an iota

Demolish this satirical pulse, retire the beat and kill

Maybe, just maybe, this time…I wouldn’t heal.

~*~

Wake me up, I’m seconds from the end
I’m dying to feel, I’ve been dying to live
Will somebody give me a sign, so I know I’m alive?
It’s time to wake me up, or pull the plug
Pull the plug! Somebody wake me up!

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letters to s.d.: fragment #2 {inked}

vi[REDACTED]inc[REDACTED]te[REDACTED]

.

the tattoo of your name

embedded in the mutilated

skin of my arms, reminds

me of why i’m surviving

this wreckage of a war

they look at it like it’s dirty,

i’m besmirched with black

but it’s the only tether to reality

that keeps pulling me back.

.

to[REDACTED]rry [REDACTED]ime pre[REDACTED] mik[REDACTED]nte[REDACTED]

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