Tag Archives: punishment

Andromeda

Can anyone reveal the bloodstains

Hiding underneath my torn lips…

Would anyone kiss it all away?

.

My thoughts are arrested at gunpoint

As if they were guilty of something—

.

But the crimes hanging my crown

Heavy on one side are nothing new

I’ve already paid for them time and time again

But why am I still being punished?

.

I can’t escape the incarceration from

What everyone else calls their brain

Try as I may to scrape off the slivers of light,

A jailbreak only makes for broken bones

And a rather crueler atonement…

.

I’m crossing thin lines inside my head

And all over my skin, precarious and fatal

Until humility becomes my illness

.

And manipulation my only chapel of truth

.

For I am no longer human; rather

I am simply a galaxy of constellated scars

.

But not a single one coruscates any longer

And my flesh becomes just another dead star

Extinguished quietly in the infinite darkness.

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Would You Turn Me On?

You took what you wanted
You got it, you know it
I’m haunted by everything that you gave me
You made me, you broke me, you saved me
I’m crazy, but I’m not done…

~*~

It doesn’t make sense to breathe

When the air is dry and stuffy

Hit my head against the bed when

You said you will never give me

What I want is what you need

So I spend my days counting greed

Breaking my backbone just to fix

Your hurtful words in fragile sticks

So if I’m right, then just blame me

And if I’m wrong, turn to punishment

But if there’s another chance for you

To forgive, I won’t hold confident

Because it doesn’t make sense to leave

When I’ve got nowhere else to go freely

Hit the road when all you have said

Are promises you could never give me.

~*~

So when you gonna give it up?
You’re giving me such a rush…
Just another pretty face
But I want one more taste…

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blood red, snow white

Wake up in a dream, frozen fear
All your hands on me
I can’t scream, I can’t scream, I can’t escape
The twisted way you think of me
I feel you in my dreams, and I don’t sleep…

~*~

vivid red, the camellias were

in full bloom today,

lush petals on a pillowed heart

.

i was finding my way

to return from tepid tides

breaking away from venus light.

.

are you hiding your needles?

From which i used to attract the

sovereign flies with, fettered

.

among suspicious hostile twitches

and pulled-off moth wings

decaying with secrets in the kitchen cabinet

.

i do not deserve absolution.

I deserve punishment and jealousy

patched upon each humilified aphorism

.

i am no longer concerned if i have

already bled out, or breathed in,

or both. or perhaps none.

.

but i am fairly certain of the

fingernail scars, tracing louvre patterns and

loveless artwork all over my arms

.

restrained; concealed amid furious

ensconcement and violent bruises

almost as pure and as fresh as

.

vivid red, the camellias were

in full bloom yesterday,

lush petals covering a beaten heart.

~*~

I can’t save your life, though nothing
I bleed for is more tormenting
I’m losing my mind and you just stand there
And stare as my world divides
You belong to me, my snow white queen
There’s nowhere to run, so let’s just get it over
Soon I know you’ll see you’re just like me
Don’t scream anymore my love, ’cause all I want is you…

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P.R. in the E.R.

Rejected, rejected
You’re never gonna be the one respected
Infected, infected
This is the way that every life is ended
No, no this life won’t swallow me whole…

~*~

Maybe I’m simply a rhetorical felony

An acrobat caught in dangling chains

A contraband of a misplaced memory

The redundant punishment to remain

A confrontation’s my personal disease

I have my cardiac arrest out on a lease

Treatment is the scalpel in the morgue

And I’ll be discharged on forms forged

Maybe I rigged the monitor for mortals

Blood doping and hoping for unreliable

Indistinct responses of epileptic arteries

Lapses and antacid are my only enemies.

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blood on my hands

Watched you bite into the bottle
Watched me kick out the chair
Let you chew up the glass
And laughed as you just hung there…

~*~

attacking

the white walls

’til my shivery

senseless knuckles

blossom into

myriad riots of

heliotrope and scarlet,

painting my fist

with burgundy blots

and cacophonic

screams of potent

mercilessness

splattering the

wall with brutality

and upset red

and an anger that’s

feeding on the migraine

at the back of my

artery-bursting temple

harsh primal senses

overtaking all of

my rationality

the adrenaline nearly

stopping my heart,

nothing but blind fury

exhausted from all sides

of this violence

i can see your face

on the goddamn wall

i don’t want to stop trying

to knock some sense

into your hallucination

of your childish disillusion

for every time

skin kisses asphalt

and soft collides with solid

it’s a tally of just how

fucking stupid you are.

i’ll keep on punching

and seething and pounding

and tearing flesh,

hoping that soon enough

one of us will just stop

trying to be a masochistic

fucker and cease such

useless punishment

and i only pray

that it will happen

all before the lusting metal

reaches your strung vein

and snaps it in half

turning the blood on my

hands into more than

just a literal connotation;

or before the grinding concrete

reaches my fragile bones

and breaks it apart

turning the damage into

more than just

a wall.

~*~

I lost my head
You couldn’t come
This lust to my brain
Almost feels like a gun…

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Apathetic Addicts in Abatement

No, don’t tell me I’m alright
It seems the more I fall, the less I come alive
It’s hard to see inside
Just take a look behind the curtain of demise…

~*~

Coerce me to torment

An ideology in cement

Humiliate every bone

Throw the initial stone

Rejecting faithless keep

Push a hatchet in deep

Neuropathic tendency

In a bellicose affability

A picaresque headline

Anaemic from decline

In a scandalous blade

White blood coagulate

So shatter the enamel

Infect in parasitic hell

Drowned in lying acid

Yet all the while placid

Apertures of cruel harm

Slaughter drastic charm

A basement ramification

Trapped curious revulsion

Alacrity for a punishment

Consequence in sentiment

Hesitation holding a while

But it was all simply facile.

~*~

I’m an addict force of habit on the double
I spark the static for dramatics call me trouble
You never would believe what I have become
And still I can’t believe I’m running…

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