Tag Archives: take

Back To The Red Tapes

You are a handful of roses
Thorns and a cheap bouquet
True, I’m a walking disaster
They told you to stay away
Seems like I’m making
A deal with the devil…

~*~

I remember when we loathed each other

And what we wouldn’t do to one up and over

Subtle poison in each vindictive word and verse

Poised to hit the most vital organs and curse

.

We smeared the walls with our cold fresh blood

Leaving basilisk messages for another pitying god

And undertones of candy-coated punches in stitch

In plates of ‘hope you die, you conniving little bitch’

.

But sometimes the relapse was felt in compassion

A confusion of collisions, casting the condensation

I didn’t know if it was coincidence, or I was insane

But the universe parked parallel, changed the game

.

Passing the halls with the same songs in our mouths

Composing about the same things that gave us doubt

Secretly racing the other one for covert little challenges

And trying to push at each other’s buttons and nuisances

.

It was a mess, and the bleak battleground ain’t so pretty

But the smoke cleared up and the aftermath forgot me

Where the sun was aglow and my coffee tasted less bitter

And tears only came in the form of erupted endeavours

.

Now I read the past stories and I want to laugh out loud

Enough to disturb the anxiety that’s keeping my head out

The snide smirks, the loose lies, the entertaining electricity

Who knows what’s meant for you and what’s meant for me

.

After the sheer mayhem that came after each round of drinks

After every conversation held and confessions begging not to think

After all the chaos caused and the devastation left in its wake

It’s a lot easier to admit I’ll miss it—I’d listen again for a rewinded take.

~*~

‘Cause I feel like a bad joke
Walk the tight rope to hold onto you
Was it real? Or a love scene
From a bad dream? I don’t think
I can forget about it…

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anatomical dissection: eyes

what do i see

that others don’t?

.

arrogant humanity

that gives nor wants

.

what do i see

that others won’t?

.

the inside of me

that takes all it wants.

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Spares

in x’s and o’s

and little shows

and softness that

makes me shiver

.

the bloom is sent

directly to my heart

like a vital sign

and verdancy delivered

.

in you’s and why’s

and quaint smiles nice

you’re a taker, not a giver

.

but when i’m left

with nothing else,

i find that you always

have something

for me left over.

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Come, Morning Light

The fire that left your blanket in ashes

Won’t trouble your cold heart anymore

And the angels that carried your parents

Will not return to take your heart to soar

.

As your little grey ragdoll sits by the ruins

Of the playground you once called “home”

And the shadows that used to play with you

Have disappeared, and now you feel so alone

.

Your tears have mixed with the relentless rain

That put out the wild flames alighting the city

Blossoms wilt and thorns flourish in the grass

The bloodred sunset is more scary than pretty

.

Your brother and sister went off with toy guns

And never returned even after they all promised

So now you sit by the orphanage’s cellar stairs

With others who lost their mummies and daddies

.

Are you alone in this world of detritus and rust?

Every light is killed with a dropping bomb again

Death is your lullaby, quiet music behind the dust

Faithless, will there be someone to save you then?

.

But no, don’t you cry now behind that gas mask

I’ll keep you safe from all the questions unasked

I’ll sing you a song, as this sky falls in fragments

Shield you with my wounded arms from the glass

.

Please don’t fear, you will never have to be hungry

You might dream of hell but heaven is yours to see

Asphalt grey and storms of gloom, as wind billows

Muffle every disaster, sleep soundly in your pillow

.

The war was never meant to be fought by innocence

Just machines to tear apart and men with losing sense

To your damaged soul, fettered with doubts and fears

No one will hurt you now…you’ll be alright, I promise

.

Someday the battle will end, and hope shall soon arrive

We can’t take back what’s lost, but we can change our lives

Open your eyes when the sun returns to shade the dawn

To see the rising daybreak where all your nightmares are gone.

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Qualms of the Divine

You took my hand and then we both started running
Both started running, there’s no place to go
Another bullet and we both started running
Both started running too; save yourself, don’t ever look back
Nowhere to go and so we both spin around in circles…

~*~

The returning memories, they hurt me

Again I’m left feeling like a total wreck

I never thought that I would ever miss

Every other reason I didn’t even expect

.

My life was a joke, but you have turned it into art

There was nothing keeping me from falling apart

But the rains withdrew to show a different painting

Of serotonin and gaslight, lighting up a cold ending

.

This is all yours to promise, and all yours to take back

My poems have turned to cinders, the ashes sift to black

But be the lapse in my rationality, be the lacuna I ache for

These memories, they haunt me, but saturate me with colour.

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Halo Blue

We tore our phones to shreds
We didn’t answer nothing
To all friends and family, lost or dead
I couldn’t get much sleep
You lost your self in mine
It couldn’t get much worse…

~*~

Systematic shutdown, and one by one my optimism closes

You pulled the plug on the starlight that keeps me awake

I may not be in my melting point, but I’m still a hot-lead mess

I think I’d rather stay dead than to keep my tongue fake

.

There’s nothing else I would feel if not for our blue hair bet

But mine is deep ocean dark, yours is a bubblegum ice cream hue

Even if we blended together, we can’t ever be a scarlet sunset

Does that mean we should just stop trying? I say it’s all up to you

.

I’m usually full of shit, but I like you and I don’t like anyone, hey

You’re one of my favourite few, and if I were well-versed, I could say

That my eyes are only four glimpses away from reaching your sun

But I’m not, so I guess all I can say is a cliche point-blank ‘you’re fun’

.

Fine, it’s not all about me and my sadness, but I don’t have to care

I’ve been withholding my cries for help ever since I discovered it was there

I might not be cool enough for your cult, but I wanna join the club

Of the haters asking for another lobotomy and demented idiots equally in love

.

With this systematic shutdown’s taking over, one by one my cynicism closes

And you pulled out the wires and circuits to turn off the stars that burned into my sleep

I don’t think I’m thinking straight from thinking about your thoughts all the time

But I would rather stay down than to keep lying to myself about what I can take and keep.

~*~

I think I’ll die obsessed
Let’s give up fighting back
You don’t need to grip the best
Because we’re lucky people
And you’ll never have to sleep alone…

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Pestilence Perpetual

Leave me in the cold, you better run away
I’m gonna dig a hole and bury all the memories we’ve made
I don’t need your condescending, words about me looking lonely
I don’t need your arms to hold me, ’cause misery is waiting on me…

~*~

It’s more than what I wanted, more than what you’d take

Misery’s just another flavour, company’s just another taste

In the palatable infections built to burn our tongues acidic

As sulphurous words are enough for the poisons to inhibit

Our ghosts might go on, but you would have to kill me first

Just to prove that I’m sincere, and that’s better for the worst

Eyes spinning under aerosol plumes, drunk on opiate fumes

More than anything, I stay awake as your parasites consumed.

~*~

I am not alone, not beaten down just yet
I am not afraid of the voices in my head
Down the darkest road, something follows me
I am not alone ’cause misery loves my company…

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Broadcasting Live From The Seatbelt

Come one, come all, you’re just in time
To witness my first breakdown
‘Cause there’s a mile gone
For every minute passed
When I’m stuck in this town…

~*~

For every minute I count at the tip of my jaded palm

Makes me believe that I can actually give a damn

Third time’s the charm, but the thirtieth’s just tiring

I’ll save my breath for the holidays I won’t be taking

.

Change the radio station when nothing good’s ever on

Witness as I crash my car high on the beat of a breakdown

Just to make the news, just ‘cause I’m fucking bored

At least something exciting happened in this deadbeat town

.

But I don’t need a doctor, and I don’t need more pills

I’m not crazy, just feeling sorry that I don’t know what to feel

Passed out from the traffic fumes, stuck in my head for hours

Wishing I had better hair, wishing I had superpowers

.

And I’m not coming clean, what else is the reason now?

Dreams don’t come for free, especially not in this late hour

My stereo’s playing the greatest hits, I’m so sick of hearing it

I’d drink beer and smoke a drag, but I don’t know when to quit

.

For every second and mile that I waste, wasted off these foolish promises

Like my ragged backseat holster and stained carpet, my existence is a mess

And this just in, the latest breaking news is that I’m already fucking breaking

But I’ll step on the brakes until it stops, until I don’t know which road I’m taking.

~*~

So go on and lock me up, you better throw away that key
Before I find out where you broadcast from
Because your playlist is killing me
I’ll change that station, light it up like the 4th of July
It’s me, I’m caller fifteen, time to play my last request…

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Seasons in Retrograde

Come at me with everything you’ve got
Burst into flames, s
cream in the dark
I’m gonna light up this place
And die in beautiful stars tonight…

~*~

They said it wouldn’t be easy

And being homesick is better than being alone

As the moon burst into flames

I ended up igniting under my coalescing bones

.

Throw me behind the darkness

And I’ll learn to breathe without the light

As the blade swings closer to me

Love, I’ll hold it back for you, and I’ll fight

.

I’m dizzy from wreaking all this havoc

Sober as the ashes melted in my numbing lips

Counting seconds until these stars drop

I’ll catch them like a nightmare, take and keep

.

Because everything looks even more beautiful

When I’m submerged a thousand feet deep in waters

And the undersea glow is a vicious accentuation

To those pale azure eyes that speak of blank aspiration

.

For they won’t come to take you back

And being homesick is better than being alone

As the midnight sun froze into winter

I ended up embracing the perennial cold for my own.

~*~

(What do you do when you’re out of time?)
(Where do you go when they’re right outside?)
(And how do you scream when there’s no one left around?)
I’m gonna light up this place (No one left around?)
And I will be the only light, I’ll be the only light.

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