Tag Archives: white

The Last Victim

We are the walking dead
Swallow the lies we’re fed
Uncover your eyes, uncover your eyes
Uncover the truth and you’ll realize
We’re hanging by a thread
We are the walking dead…

~*~

I was convinced of myself, at first.

Before mercy turned to failure and hell begged over to madness, everything seemed to be quite rational. Perfectly-planned. Dare I even say, elegantly beautiful. The conceived scenario played out in my head like an unraveling film spiel, woven into a viscid, intricate web and ensnaring naive hearts, and the sharp, unexpected twist and blunted violent stab of that final ending made the jagged suspense, the heart-wrenching thrill, the never-ending mystery and uncertainty, every slighted emotion thrown out and ravaged by the starving sharks, all of it…made everything worth it.

But now all I have is murder in my tongue, lies over my eyes, and your blood on my hands.

How did it all come to this?

Everything looks so red, even after I thoroughly scrubbed myself clean of the transgression. I made sure to meticulously tidy everything up. White walls, white floor, white bleached palms, white light pouring over the windows, a whiteness so pure and bright it’s fucking blinding, but the red obstinately stays. And it stains. On the white walls, on the white floor, on my chafed shaky hands, all over the room’s white-blanched windows like a sinner’s stained glass art, that redness so dark and demented that I can’t even clearly discern anymore where the colour ends and the shadows begin.

I have no excuse. I have no absolution from the crime I’ve committed. I cannot be pardoned, cannot be forgiven, and I’ll never forgive myself for what I’ve done. I know I deserve a punishment of nothing less than death. But I didn’t know it would come to this. I didn’t know what I was doing.

But I’m not sorry. And if I had to do it again, I would. Without any hesitations. Without thinking twice.

Without thinking about it all.

God forgive me.

~*~

Can anything bring us back to life?
Will anything make us right?
Can anything bring us back to life?
I’m willing to make us right?
‘Cause the further that we’re falling apart
The more that it breaks my heart…

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The Girl With The White Bracelets

Oh, pretty girl, keep batting your eyes
‘Cause when you breathe you lie, lie
Oh, pretty girl, you better think twice
‘Cause second chances are rarer than I
How can we forget who we have become?
I’ll give it all up, please wake up
Every breath you take is a lie…

~*~

She asked for death, and who was I to refuse

She got sick of the radio and wanted the noose

She didn’t want another dance, just the last one

She sold all the bullets she had just to buy a gun

.

She was sick and she was tired of feeling pathetic

She didn’t like the smell of the hospital antiseptics

She was the class-act patient but she was no victim

She fixed her wounds but got worse off and broken

.

She screamed for mercy to taste all their cruelty

She was running away from all their emergency

She emerged from hell, to be thrown back again

She asked for demise at the tip of her bloody pen

.

She tried every method and every single execution

She went by the blades, gas, a wrongful transfusion

She beat her body in bruised painting of a night sky

She didn’t look for any help and nobody asked why

.

She was the girl that I still dream about in my head

She was the girl I wanted to save from this deep red

She was the girl begging for this chance, but instead

She’s the girl who is restrained and laying on my bed.

~*~

How did you ever see me broken?
Well, you forced me to find out everyday
Did you ever see me open?
Well, you forced me to find out everyday…

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dear clumsy lovely

Living in the dark makes
Our light seem cold
I distract myself awake
But in my dreams
You’re playing our song…

~*~

missus cupid, trade a penny for a cloud

i thought too much, and i thought aloud

lucid blue until i’m pink, but you are not

what i wished for, now my face feels hot

.

i’ll be the blueprint to your candy laughs

you don’t have to hesitate or even cough

i was not looking, but guess what i found

a cherub sleeping alone without a sound

.

missus cupid, have a penny for your thoughts?

you dreamed too much, and you dreamed a lot

lacklustre white until i’m dark, but you’re all that

i ever asked for, so let’s be lucky with all we’ve got.

~*~

I’ll tell my friends we made amends
Tying up loose ends; they’re not sold
But if you want it, you can have it
You can have me in full…

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Ephemeral Bride

I am a million pieces of the sky
I found a way to be alone
I’m gonna wait until you want me
Until you finally decide to go home…

~*~

Ephemeral bride of my dreams

Wedding-white veil torn at the seams

Diamond gleam and diamond ring

Purple finger and purple serene

.

Ephemeral bride of my dreams

Efflorescence like an imperial queen

Crystalline wine and crystalline skin

Scarlet bouquet and scarlet lips

.

Ephemeral bride of my dreams

Velvet tapestry fair, thy curtain skin

Sapphire eyes and sapphire crown

Blushing cheeks and blushing gown

.

Ephemeral bride of my dreams

Mine sweet erudition adorned within

Emerald fragrance and emerald tongue

Golden church bells and golden lungs

.

Ephemeral bride of my dreams

The chapel doors open, the march begins

Obsidian promises and obsidian “I do”

Before grey eyes open up to a greyer gloom.

~*~

I saw her smiling from the top of the world
I saw her sleeping on, amazing I know
If you lower, lower, lower me down
You lower me clearly, so come and lower me…

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Inconceivable

What haven’t I done? What have I done?
What haven’t I done to deserve a cold war
On all sides? It’s so bleak all the time
“Stay with me. You’re alone in the center of hell. Just be.”
The longest winter I have ever seen
From hospital to hospital, repeat…

~*~

Her eyes won’t open up anymore

As the flower in her womb began to wilt tonight

Petals sifting into her nervous system

And she looks so good in bandaged white

.

Won’t you stay with me, please?!

The traffic lights won’t amount to the hell

That I’m driving myself straight into

Hoping to find her broken body at the end of the well

.

For a while, she was beginning to blossom

Delicate heliotrope blots dotting her pallid cheeks

But the intruding scarlet painted her open lips

She looks so beautiful, please let this be a trick…

.

Hold on, please hold on, I’ll be there with you

If only you’d take a breath if I held mine as long as I do

I could kill god for all the wrongs I’ve committed

But that doesn’t give him the right to take it out on you

.

Her pulsating shallow beat is slowly going thud thud thud

Like my fist on the hospital doors, I arrived in time for the flatline

As the thorns rage around her heart, the flower begins to decay

If she loses, then I’ve lost, I wouldn’t have it any other way

.

I can’t…I can’t believe this…why did you—why did you leave me?

My foot won’t ease on the pedal, and the carbon monoxide is choking

‘Cause there’s a light at the end of the tunnel, and I can see her face

Calling out to me, the headlights blind me as I fall into her embrace…

.

C R A S H.

~*~

First I need to save the life of god
So that god can come and save me from myself
If I have to walk alone I’m giving up
I can’t stay here knowing love is not enough…

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Saturni Ad Infinitum

~*~

CHANGE OF PACE

To see the clouds dragged down in vain

Another schism pulled away into disdain

An aftershock of cyanide writ in red letters

The austerity banished and again embittered.

~*~

MIKO

Disconnected dissension dwelt in maiden shrines

A lone voice seeks peace in a tempest of rigid design

In precarious erudition and fraudulent disputation

As her ebony tapestry is burned in laureate predilection.

~*~

DELLE PIOVERE

Recherche glistening in rusticated reveries of diamond dewdrops

An avalanche of labyrinthine dreams brimming to the cusp

Illicit, a monochrome heart searches tranquility in the midst of dissonance

Nihilism whispers for each staccato beat, as behind the pale moon, shadows dance in elegance.

~*~

TAKING BACK RED

Notches on the canvas that used to be the purest of white

Now reduced to common insanity, pilfering a virgin sight

Chagrined wish never uttered, held at the back of interface

And hope—against hope, that the ruptures will be erased.

~*~

CHASING FOR A GLIMPSE

Just tell me when you’re down, and we can go downtown

To paint the rain with auburn blues, draw on every smiley face a frown

Just tell me when you’re not alright, and we can stay all night

To pen about storms in chemical black, write until you take back the light.

~*~

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Blank Dream

I’ll float on endlessly
Senses alluding me
This long horizon to this open sea…

~*~

a gabardine slate

in falling reveries

jilted aquamarine

of sweet rosemary

and hues of pastel

flourishing in blots

in field of lavender

tying sailor’s knots

lost aurora borealis

an occasion of hues

vivid shades collide

fed up with the blues

a grey sky lights up in stars

and in starkest chromaticity

but somehow a blank dream

is all my hazy eyes can perceive.

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Technicolour

pink stains

on lily petals

purple rain

in its coevals

a red boy

writing letters

green toy

spins in flatters

black rose

for that beauty

white pose

sing it with me

a blue girl

on the sun rays

yellow twirl

awed she plays

orange eyes

happily sparkled

rainbow lives

hearts all coloured.

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Candied Bones

So I crunch the candies

Like bones in my mouth

Sweet flooded saccharin

Taste of visceral doubts

Rotund as an ivory strip

Pale striped peppermint

Red and white and that

Coppery taste, just hints

And fragments that I have

Inhaled through my lungs

And I crunched the bones

Like candies in my tongue.

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